Ways In Which I Nearly Kill My Husband

[shiraphant]

Me: Wow. A UK survey apparently found that the perfect BMI for attracting a man is 20.85!

James: Oh, really?

Me: Yes! Which means that I have the perfect BMI for attracting over two men!

James: *almost dies laughing due to choking on his too-hot mouthful of food*

Comments

[synnoveaevael.livejournal.com]

hhahahahah!!!

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Our men need to watch out! We've got more than enough BMI to go round!

[synnoveaevael.livejournal.com]

helllzzz yeah!

[tafagirl.livejournal.com]

Lol!

Good to see you, girl :-) How are you doing??

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Ehh, not marvellously, but as you may be able to tell I've been reading a lot of fat-acceptance stuff recently :)

[brain-opera.livejournal.com]

Heh!

One and a half men over here! Hurrah!

[redshira.livejournal.com]

What will we do with the part-men? Do you think we can save them up and send off for a whole one, like coupons from the back of cereal boxes?

[apiphile.livejournal.com]

Fortunately, I have the perfect BMI for attracting women. Butch women. :D :D :D :D :D

[redshira.livejournal.com]

You are a lucky lucky sod.

[apiphile.livejournal.com]

Butch women who already have girlfriends and regretfully tell you this while eyeballing your cleavage and dropping hints that, should anything happen to their currently stable relationship, you'll be the first to know.

... mildly unnerving.

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, possibly not ideal...

Having said that, I find it difficult to imagine you being unnerved :)

[goodqueenmolly.livejournal.com]

Madam, I bow before your genius

[redshira.livejournal.com]

I thank you :) It just seemed logical!

[evilref.livejournal.com]

Good for you!

As you say, BMI is horseshit. To me the giveaway is that it is so strongly determined by cultural values. If that UK study was conducted in another country, (or even in the UK in a different century) it would get a different answer.

Which just shows that people read too many magazines.

Of course in a species where the primary organ of sexual display is the one between the ears, the obsession with physical shape is fetishism of the worst sort. But that's OK: if the stupid men are all busy chasing size zero, that's all the more smart women for the rest of us. :-) :-) :-)

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Ooh, hello! I found out today that I FAIL like a big failing thing, at remembering to send emails instead of letting them languish in my drafts box. It boiled down to "we have worked out that no matter what we do, there's no way we can afford to do a recce to Ireland any time soon" :( but I will write a more up-to-date one and send it tomorrow, migraine and cramps allowing.

You would be appalled by some of the stuff I've been reading recently on the fat-activist and health-at-every-size blogs. Probably not too surprised, but appalled all the same.

[evilref.livejournal.com]

I'd figured that the time wasn't right. Both our lives are a bit chaotic at the moment. I look forward to seeing you both when things settle down.

As for health-at-every-size, it wouldn't surprise me. I'm not sure which end of the spectrum is more worrying, though.

And I still blame the magazines.

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Yes, we still (obviously) really want to come over and it'll be great when we finally manage it. We've worked out an itinerary and everything.

I'm a great advocate of health-at-every-size, that being the idea of every person having the right to appropriate healthcare regardless of their size (also the idea that fat does not necessarily mean unhealthy, and thin does not always mean healthy. It's that whole correlation does not equal causation thing). Too many fat people are denied it because doctors simply cannot see anything other than OMG FAT, even when the weight of the person isn't actually relevant. I've had it all my adult life. I mean, for god's sake, I went in for a pelvic ultrasound the other week and had the technician tell me that she was sure I drank lots of fizzy drinks (I never touch the vile things) and that I must make sure to eat plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. As if fresh veg (not so much fruit because of the sugar content) didn't constitute at least 50% of everything I eat. I would have said something pretty sharp, except there's not much you can say when someone's lecturing you about your supposedly unhealthy diet while they're wiggling a probe around inside you.

The magazines have a lot to do with it, yes. I shan't get into it or we'd be here for ever and I'd exceed the character limit. Twice.

[evilref.livejournal.com]

I think I've misunderstood you. I thought you were referring to the pro-ana crowd. The denial of healthcare to people who are considered overweight is one I am depressingly familiar with, as my mother has suffered it for at least twenty years. She won't suffer it for another twenty, though, since she is unlikely to live that long. A lot of that can be blamed on earlier neglect. :-( :-( :-(

I hadn't realised people were trying to change it. I'm all for that.

Would you like comments on an itinerary?

[tomatorama.livejournal.com]

Things like being fat or wearing glasses etc. are a great shallow-dull-non-unique person deflector!

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Yes! Exactly. Being fat automatically weeds out a lot of the arseholes.

[ephemera.livejournal.com]

you are awesome :D

[redshira.livejournal.com]

As are you, my lovely. When do we get Aliceage here in Cambourne?

[tomatorama.livejournal.com]

You are ace.

If everyone was average what people fancied, the whole world would have wishy-washy coloured hair and be average height and averagely intelligent and such. BORING.

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Well exactly. I saw a photo of a woman modelling a Halloween costume called Sexy Anna Rexia, which is disgusting enough in itself, but then someone commented that the model was "kind of chubby"...I swear she couldn't have been any bigger than a UK6/8.

Wait, here's the link.

[cx650.livejournal.com]

Does that mean I can attract three women?

*Ducks cornflakes*

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Nope, it didn't say anything about the ideal BMI for a man to attract women. Surprisingly enough. *does not rant about Teh Patriarchy*

[kankurette.livejournal.com]

Heh. I think Jon and I could attract at least 3 people between us. I don't want to know what my BMI is, even though (as people have said) it isn't accurate, seeing as how muscle is heavier than fat.

[redshira.livejournal.com]

Yup. BMI = big old pile of crap. Back before I was put on The Evil Pill, I was able to wear anything I liked and look damn good, I was healthy and active, you could count my ribs if I raised my arms, I was not remotely fat. I weighed 12 stone at 5' 8". I'm heavily built with extremely dense bones and a lot of muscle. I was being told I was two stone overweight even then, but I would have looked ridiculous. My perfectly normal-sized brother - also built with a broad frame, dense bones and plenty of muscle - was told to lose a stone and a half when there was not a single ounce of spare fat on him. He did that thing, but it was all muscle loss. I'm convinced he'd be finding his police training less hard-going if he'd not been forced to lose that weight.

[cx650.livejournal.com]

When I was your brother's age I was built like a bionic broomstick and I was still 14 stone. This ordered weight-loss concerns me.

BMI = Big Massive Insult

[discobabs.livejournal.com]

Hey - me too - lets have an orgy...