shiraphant: (hip to my jive)
[personal profile] shiraphant
Dear People Who Designed The Packaging For My Fertility Drugs:

FUCK YOU for putting that cutesy little mummy-daddy-baby logo on the case that I have to open every day just before I inject myself to try and make my ovaries do their damn job. FUCK YOU for reminding me about HAPPY FAMILIES as if I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT I WAS INJECTING MYSELF FOR - it doesn't "give me hope", it just PISSES ME OFF - and ALSO FUCK YOU for your FUCKING HETERONORMATIVE ASSUMPTIONS.

No love

A BIG FAT QUEER WHO CAN'T OVULATE WITHOUT YOUR COMPANY'S FUCKING HELP.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:21 pm (UTC)
ailbhe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ailbhe
I'd change "fuck" to "it is grossly insensitive of you" in almost every instance and send it to 'em, if I were you.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Thank you! I was looking for a way to de-expletivise it so I could send it to them but my brain was stuck on "fuck yooooooooou". I would say this might have something to do with the drugs themselves but I'm always like this.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:29 pm (UTC)
ailbhe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ailbhe
It's a perfectly rational response to such callous insensitivity.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
I'm glad it's not just me then. It's like when I had to go and see an "infertility counsellor" (did not want, but the arsehole gynaecologist insisted I had to) and her office was a) right next to the maternity ward b) had a waiting area with two big photo albums full of pictures of babies on the table. WHAT.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:56 pm (UTC)
ailbhe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ailbhe
Gynae ward, I was in for perineal rescontruction; TV in waiting room was showing back to back soap operas, all with a miscarriage theme. Lots and lots of women with tears streaming silently down their faces. I was too sick and panicky to turn the damn thing off.

Date: 2010-01-23 08:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
That's just horrific. I would say "you'd THINK the staff would pay a LITTLE ATTENTION to stuff like that" but, you know. I know better than to think that.

Date: 2010-01-24 08:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kankurette.livejournal.com
Good lard, that's horrific.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lozette.livejournal.com
Every time I've had to deal with something gynae-related I've seen similar stuff. The first time was in 1992, I was 15 and needed an ultrasound for my fibroids. They made me wait in the same waiting room as all the fertility patients - me, sitting there, in my SCHOOL UNIFORM with an ultrasound slip in my hands. I think all the women thought I was a gymslip mum and I had about 1000 dirty looks. I'd never been so horrified in my life.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Oh that must have been delightful for you. How mortifying.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lozette.livejournal.com
And people wonder why I'm so reluctant to see gynaecologists to get all my issues sorted out. Because at 13/14/15 I was having to go through stuff like that and have 50+ male gynaecologists giving me pelvic exams etc. So much fun for a teenager!

Date: 2010-01-23 09:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Oh god yes, there's no dignity and the infantilisation never ends; in my teens I kind of expected the patronising tones to disappear once I got to my early twenties at least but noooo.

Date: 2010-01-24 04:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tomatorama.livejournal.com
LOL I've been there, aged 16 for PCOS.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2010-01-23 09:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
But but it's meant to give me HOPE and make me think of the HAPPY CATALOGUE-MODEL FAMILY I'LL HAVE if I just spend enough money on their drugs and KEEP TRYING STAY POSITIVE DON'T LOSE HOPE unless you're one of those revolting queers.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2010-01-23 09:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Ooorrrr WE KNOW YOU EXIST BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO ENCOURAGE YOUR UNNATURAL WAYS BY ACKNOWLEDGING YOU BECAUSE THINK OF THE CHILLLLLLLLLDRENNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NLKDSAAFHJKSA;JFSD;CKI\A'AGT

You know, I have massive straight-passing privilege because I married a man, but if I'd stayed with Caitlin I have a feeling that I would have found it much harder to get treatment.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lozette.livejournal.com
What the holy bollocking hell!

Date: 2010-01-23 09:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Yeah. James got the nail-polish remover out and rubbed the gold logo off but it's still there because the case itself is textured and matte except for the shape of the logo, which is smooth and shiny. Still, it's not in my face now.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:51 pm (UTC)
ext_83784: Me at Wasteland, Amsterdam - April 2009 (Fear my spork)
From: [identity profile] strangelover.livejournal.com
What the fucking fuck kind of insensitive advertising is that? Talk about dangling the carrot. And of course, only straight people want babies. Urgh. Serious fucking fail.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
It's just the latest thing in a long line of sensitivity fail on the part of people who are in the business of treating infertile women.

In Galway there is a fertility clinic where only married couples are eligible for treatment. I imagine there are a lot of places like that dotted around the world.

GGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Date: 2010-01-26 05:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] discobabs.livejournal.com
Don't feel bad - I got the "disabled women shouldn't be allowed to have children" BS.

O.K. Asshats - I have had some doctor with their hands inside of me since I was 9 and the PCOS started. I want a baby. I am an adult and KNOW its a lot of work. So don't fucking MICROMANAGE MY BRAIN!!!

(dusts off assault rifle...)

grrargh

Date: 2010-01-24 12:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lydiasings.livejournal.com
So much fucking idiot fail in there. Gah. Kick their asses. Can we get a queer rage rampage group going? Definitely write them a long haranguing letter. I might add "this is a fertility treatment, NOT an 80s perfume advert" in.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ankaret.livejournal.com
That is completely repulsive. It's no wonder at all you're upset. The packaging was probably designed by some smug smarmy twenty-two-year-old 'ideas man' and I hope his balls fall off.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
I'm so glad it's not just me, I really thought I might be overreacting (at least about the happy-families bit, I knew I wasn't about the heteronormativity bit). I'm not surprised by this any more - see my comment to [livejournal.com profile] ailbhe above about seeing the infertility counsellor, and [livejournal.com profile] ailbhe's reply to me, for examples of routine callousness in this arena - but I am getting more and more infuriated every time I encounter it. I've been doing this infertility schtick for nearly ten years now and the attitudes have not improved one bit.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] puzzled-anwen.livejournal.com
FUCK THEM sideways with a fucking acid-coated dictionary so they get papercuts and then the papercuts are FILLED WITH ACID.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
You would THINK they might STOP for ONE SECOND and go "hang on, this might not be the best idea" BUT APPARENTLY NOT.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] puzzled-anwen.livejournal.com
They have probably all got BABIES and WIVES who HAD THE BABIES WITH NO REAL PROBLEMS EXCEPT OH MAYBE ONE MISCARRIAGE OR WHATEVS and can all FUCK RIGHT OFF.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
and I BET they didn't even PAY MUCH ATTENTION if their WIVES (it would have to be WIVES not any other kind of partner) did miscarry, what with that being WIMMINZ BIZNISS. Fuckers.

Date: 2010-01-23 10:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deviblue.livejournal.com
It may be worth sending an email/letter to the company to say how insensetive that kind of packaging is given the major consumer group.

If that doesn't work I'll just have to put them in the same room when you're in one of your fury rage times...they'll soon change it then

Date: 2010-01-23 10:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
I intend to send a less expletive-filled version of this to them. I fully expect to be ignored but, you know. Got to say something.

#($&@*&^#@#^%!@%$#^

Date: 2010-01-26 05:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] discobabs.livejournal.com
I can certainly massage the HAVE A HAPPY PERIOD shit that one tampon company here uses to advertise their product.

now... where did I put my bullets?

Date: 2010-01-23 11:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hopeness.livejournal.com
Oh, so been there. And the vitamins - they are pink and blue with a little picture of a pregnant woman on them and the insert actually says that they discovered women were more compliant taking their vitamins as the woman reminded them that they were helping their (non-existent, in my case) pregnancy.

Date: 2010-01-23 11:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
Wow, that's seriously obnoxious. I mean, I've kind of got used to my folic acid pills having a silhouette of a pregnant woman on the tub (thankfully not on each individual pill) but at least they're not pink and blue, ugh.

Date: 2010-01-23 11:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spyderfyngers.livejournal.com
ARG.

You know, they sent me to the fertility outpatients clinic by mistake, once. And I sat there, surrounded by pictures of jolly healthy babies and thought how horribly insensitive it was. Pink walls, too, naturally.

Date: 2010-01-23 11:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redshira.livejournal.com
I don't know what the hell they're thinking, really; if everyone else can see it's a bad idea then why do they keep doing it?

And of course the walls were pink, because us girlz like pink! It's hardwired! Something to do with berries! And flushed happy (white-people) faces! Or something.

Date: 2010-01-24 01:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brain-opera.livejournal.com
White too, I bet.

And yes, they should fuck themselves.

Date: 2010-01-24 04:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tomatorama.livejournal.com
PEOPLE HAVE NO BRAIMS

Date: 2010-01-24 08:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kankurette.livejournal.com
That is pretty tactless. :\ Kind of like the whole tits-out-for-charity thing.

Date: 2010-01-24 10:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dragonmamma.livejournal.com
All the comments above from both you and the others who are in a similar situation are truly appalling. Never having been in your situation, I have never encountered such attitudes before. Since I am one of those fortunately happy people who decided, tried, conceived first time round all I ever received were smiles and approbation. But to think that my sisters out there are STILL being treated in such a heartless and shabby way is truly upsetting. I thought (in my ignorance and innocence) that most of those prejudices and male dominated attitudes were all gone now. Stick in there kid, the sisterhood is with you. Even if we dont all share your problems we share your hopes and aspirations to be treated as a perfectly normal human being whatever your particular life choices are.

Insensitivity Inc.

Date: 2010-01-26 05:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] discobabs.livejournal.com
How FUCKING INSENSITIVE!

Unreal... that's not positive imaging - that's rubbing your face in the fact that many of us don't feel like REAL WOMEN AND NEVER WILL because our DEFECTIVE bodies won't do what a NORMAL WOMAN'S would without massive amounts of drugs.

Unreal... just UNREAL!!!

What is the name/ address/ email of this company??? I feel a blast-o-gram coming on.

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December 2010

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