Dec. 8th, 2009 01:34 pm
shiraphant: (down with this sort of thing)
[personal profile] shiraphant
Dear Aunt Yvonne

Thank you for the Christmas card, it was a timely reminder that I am probably too late sending out mine. All this is by the by, however, because the main point I want to address is this: MY NAME IS NOT MRS JAMES BECKETT. NOBODY CALLS ME JAMES. BECAUSE IT IS NOT MY NAME. I AM A WHOLE SEPARATE PERSON IA;AEKJF'FGNDFLSKDG FSCSDAK

Date: 2009-12-08 01:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Shush. You are both James and Christian just admit it.

Date: 2009-12-08 01:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh bob dammit you're right. Deck the halls with pies of mincemeat, etc.

Date: 2009-12-08 01:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Wow, where does she live? The 19th century? o_O

Date: 2009-12-08 03:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Something like that! I mean ok, she's in her mid-sixties, but *still*.

Date: 2009-12-08 03:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
And my mum who also thinks my name is James when I'm receiving a card, is only 54! There's really no excuse.

Date: 2009-12-08 01:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
After my now niece-in-law* got engaged (engaged, not married!) my mother sent her a card calling her "Firstname Nephew'sName-MaidenName"

Oh my frigging god.

We didn't even know at that point if N-I-L was going to change her name on marriage! Ugh my mother is so presumptive.

People like your aunt and my mum are stuck a few centuries ago, for reals.

* ie. my nephew's wife :-)

Date: 2009-12-08 03:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Your mum is pretty damn special. Where by special I mean lucky not to have been fishslapped about a thousand times by you.

My mum, when I phoned and mentioned the Mr & Mrs James Beckett thing, said "Yes, that's correct" and I said IT'S CORRECT ON A PLANET WHERE MY NAME IS JAMES AND I AM NOT A SEPARATE PERSON ARGH ARGH.

My mum thinks my feminism is an annoying habit of mine.

Date: 2009-12-08 03:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I think she confuses feminism with etiquette (or just plainly being sensible).

Date: 2009-12-08 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Possibleeee. Once, I was talking to my sister-in-law (before she married my brother) about various feminist things, and my mother came in and asked what I was doing. I said "I'm turning Simone into a feminist!" and my mother gave me a filthy look and Simone exclaimed "Oh no, don't!" at me as if I was magically going to transform her into a fat hairy lesbian or something...

Date: 2009-12-08 03:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh dear...

Date: 2009-12-09 02:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I just misread that as 'fairy hat lesbian'. Which sounds quite nice.

Date: 2009-12-10 02:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That's much nicer. I think I know some of those.

Date: 2009-12-08 03:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Well it is, evidently! I mean, who in their right mind would let women own houses / go to school / get healthcare etc!!!

Date: 2009-12-08 03:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
This is the weird thing! My mum was always very much emphasising "you don't need to get married, you have to get a good education and be totally financially independent and never rely on any man, and you don't want kids, you were Made for Higher Things, any fool can have a baby" and then as soon as I hit 25 she was all I THINK YOU SHOULD BE GETTING MARRIED and I went "whuh? WHAT HAPPENED TO MY MOTHER?" I think my feminism involves too much thinking about unpalatable truths for her liking. Actually, let's just leave it at "too much thinking".

Date: 2009-12-08 01:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hello, James, nice to see you on tinterwebs!

Date: 2009-12-08 03:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hello, isn't my beard looking fine today?

Date: 2009-12-08 03:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Yes. Also I like your penis

Date: 2009-12-08 02:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Send it back saying 'person not known at this address, occupant is Mrs Caitlin lastnamewhichiforgetrightnow'

Date: 2009-12-08 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I would if it wouldn't cause so much hassle. I tried to make my point by addressing their card to Mr S. and Mrs Y. Altman. Nrgh. They all think James and I are weird anyway because we both took each other's names.

Date: 2009-12-08 03:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Maybe she was having a senior moment and forgot your name?

Date: 2009-12-08 03:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Ha, I wish I could believe this. It wouldn't excuse my mum, though. Oh humans.

Date: 2009-12-08 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
It wasn't that long ago that it was considered normal.

My grandmother still signs her name sometimes as Mrs. Jay Kochman, and in my elementary school yearbook, teachers are identified as Mrs. Richard Johnson (for example!)


Date: 2009-12-08 03:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I know, and it's so depressing! My mum maintains that It Is Correct and in vain do I try and point out that I am not owned by or part of my husband.

Date: 2009-12-08 04:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

I have little to add, but ARG.

Date: 2009-12-08 05:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
ARG even more because I know, I know, that being A Married lends me more credibility when I go and see doctors.

Date: 2009-12-08 05:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Could be worse. She could've called you Gonzo. Or Pete. Or Chuck. ;)

I hate being referred to as Mrs. Andrew Fisher. I'm like, "Why can't we call HIM Mr. Sara Fisher, ehhhh???"

Date: 2009-12-08 05:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Shut it, Andrew :P

Why not even call him Mr Sara Hlavati? I addressed my mum's Christmas card to Mummy and Mr Mummy, after my mum told me I shouldn't complain about being called Mrs James Beckett because "it's correct". I don't get it. She was all in favour of James taking my name so we're both Sandler Becketts when we told her about it.

Date: 2009-12-08 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Well, I took his last name, so my name isn't "Hlavati" anymore, but I do get what you're trying to say!

Date: 2009-12-08 05:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Your aunt appears to be living in 1950. Could you ask her to pick me up some hair nets whilst she's there, and possibly the odd swing album?

Date: 2009-12-08 05:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
That's a fantastic idea, but I think they still have rationing where she is...

Date: 2009-12-08 07:01 pm (UTC)
ailbhe: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ailbhe
It is never and has never been correct etiquette to address someone by the wrong name.

We got one of those yesterday; I said "Rob, there's a card for you," he winced and said "Yes, I saw," and then he binned it.

Date: 2009-12-09 01:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Date: 2009-12-09 09:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh, dear, how quaint. Just because she's over sixty is no excuse for acting senile, after all I'm 62 myself, but couldnt possibly think of you as "Mrs James"
I took "himselfs" name and cant be bothered to change it but even so I'm Mrs Pat kelly (to those who dont really know me, but preferably Dragonmamma to those who do.
Not a rabid feminist like you but even so I get insulted by that sort of thing.
Btw nice to see you back on the planet again. Hope you have a joyous MiWinter festival of eating and drinking and hoping for the return of the sun as the year turns.


shiraphant: (Default)

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